Thursday 13 December 2007

Permohonan Untuk Berpoligami


Suami bin Lelaki
17, Jalan Angkasa,
24300, Kemaman.
Isteri binti Perempuan
17, Jalan Angkasa,
24300, Kemaman.
31 April 2006
Puan,
PERKARA : PERMOHONAN UNTUK BERPOLIGAMI
Perkara di atas adalah di rujuk.
2. Sebab utama permohonan ini di lakukan adalah kerana saya ingin melengkapkan kuota yang telah di peruntukkan bagi saya. Buat masa ini kuota yang telah di isi cuma satu, memandangkan masih ada 3 kekosongan, eloklah jika dapat di penuhi secepat mungkin. Pihak yang akan mengisi satu kekosongan ini buat masa ini ialah Cik Hana Fazura binti Ramli yang merupakan setiausaha saya di pejabat. Memandangkan komitmen yang beliau tunjukkan di pejabat amat baik, eloklah jika kita masukkan dia bersama kita di dalam organisasi keluarga kita. Kekosongan yang selebihnya akan di isi di masa akan datang.
3. Untuk makluman pihak puan, yang sebenarnya masalah ini telah lama saya fikirkan tetapi memandangkan poket saya yang selalu nipis, terpaksalah saya tangguhkan dulu permohonan ini di samping kurangnye rasa keyakinan untuk mengemukakan permohonan ini. Kini, setelah saya dapat mengeluarkan kesemua duit pelaburan ASB saya, saya merasakan kembalinya semangat saya yang telah hilang selama ini.
4. Permohonan ini amat setimpal kerana dengan kedudukan sekarang ia menguntungkan kedua belah pihak dan juga pihak ketiga. Selama ini hidup kita bahagia sebab jika tidak, manakan mungkin puan dapat menjadi seperti sekarang. Semua yang puan miliki sudah bertambah besar. Kereta besar, rumah besar, rantai besar dan pakaian besar. Jika dulu potongan puan seperti gitar, kini sudah bertukar menjadi drum. Oleh itu, sudilah kiranya dapat kita kongsi bersama insan lain kebahagiaan kita ini.
5. Pihak puan juga dapat menikmati faedah dari kelulusan permohonan ini kerana puan akan tetap menikmati apa yang telah puan miliki sekarang dengan waktu bekerja lebih singkat dan sistem syif akan di perkenalkan iaitu 1 hari kerja dan 1 hari cuti rehat. Waktu bekerja yang selebihnya akan ditampung oleh pihak ketiga. Kebaikan yang puan akan nikmati ialah waktu rehat yang bebas kerana dalam waktu puan bercuti, saya selaku Penyelia tidak akan memantau aktiviti yang puan lakukan. Pada waktu itu saya cuma akan fokus kepada hasil kerja pihak ketiga. Menguntungkan bukan?
6. Segala kerjasama dari pihak puan saya dahulukan dengan ribuan terima kasih. Saya amat berharap pihak puan dapat meluluskan permohonan saya ini kerana adalah lebih baik jika kita dapat berkongsi kebahagiaan kita ini bersama insan lain. Saya harap permohonan saya ini di balas dengan senyuman penuh keikhlasan dari pihak puan dan tandatangan puan di atas kertas yang saya lampirkan bukannya balingan periuk nasi, pinggan-mangkuk, ketukan senduk dan perkara-perkara yang menyukarkan pihak puan untuk melakukannya.
7. Saya harap puan sudi meluluskan permohonan ini. Hadirkanlah senyumanmu sebagaimana ketika kita menyambut orang baru iaitu bayi kita kedalam keluarga kita 10 tahun lepas. Situasinya lebih kurang sama dengan masa kini. Kita akan menerima orang baru juga cuma bezanya ialah jika 10 tahun yang lepas kita perlu menjaga dan membelainya dengan manja bersama tetapi kali ini, setiap urusan penjagaan dan belaian manja akan di laksanakan oleh saya sepenuhnya.
8. Akhir kata, saya harap permohonan saya ini dapat dibalas secepat mungkin. Semoga kita bersama-bersama dengan pihak ketiga akan dapat melaksanakan program ini dengan jayanya.
Sekian, Terima Kasih.
“BERKORBAN DAN BERKONGSI KEBAHAGIAAN LAMBANG RUMAHTANGGA BAHAGIA”
Yang Ikhlas Memohon,
Suami bin Lelaki
Nota :
En Suami bin Lelaki telah menarik kembali permohonan ini setelah Puan Isteri binti Perempuan bertanyakan “Nak suruh saya tandatangan dimana? Guna pisau boleh bang..?”.
Kini anda berpeluang untuk hantarkan surat yang sedia didraf ini kepada isteri anda pula. Caranya, cuma tukarkan nama dan alamat pengirim dan penerima. Kalau anda berani cubalah…. ahaks!
p.s. Don’t ask me where did I get this… My aunt sent this out via email and I find it’s really farcial!

Wednesday 28 November 2007

Learn Some Things From The Male Gender

Males and females evolved differently. Men mastered pure logical thinking while feeling become a more obvious characteristic of feminine psychology. Every woman follows her feelings as a guide throughout life. She blames herself for any failure while a man rather criticizes other and tries to solve the problem in a rational way.
Here a few tips from experts how a masculine intellection can ease women life and help to come through.
Don’t be afraid of criticizing. Most women are certain that serious intercommunion depend only on their own. They usually are afraid of criticizing only because they don’t want to ruin good relationships and strive to be well-liked by others. So, men and women communicate and behave very different. Men can spill out comments very easily, they make decisions faster and think less about their already expressed opinion. Women more often worry that their stated remark can make somebody feel hurt.
Don’t get so wrought-up. Express your notion in the concrete and clearly. You shouldn’t be worry that someone could take an offence or want to judge you for something. Try to push such emotions away and you will be wonder-struck. Have you ever heard a man who begins his request with such words as – “I regret”, “sorry”, “maybe” or “I feel”? Use to trust in yourself, measure your achievements realistically and never fear to ask for a better reward. If a man realizes that he deserves a bigger salary, that’s never a problem, he exacts it rigidly.
Stay off the food. Researchers claim that the diet itself works on men better than on women. This is because men are unapt to relate emotional state with food. They never fall to eat being anxious, lonely or stressful. Men never reproach or blame themselves for eating a huge pizza or doughnut and for consuming too much calories. They eat when they feel hungry and stop when they feel satiate. So, learn from men – always control how much you eat and never blame the diet you have chosen.
Don’t not worry for one slip – just try everything all over again. Housekeeping load divide up with other members of your family. Considering data of various research women spares double time more for housekeeping and children care than men. Even the working women think that home is entirely their own dominion. On the contrary men always think that every their accomplished activity should be recognized and appreciated by others. Many women strive to complete their tasks perfectly both at home and at work. So, being involved in this circle, they become exhausted by their work and for this reason problems grow faster and faster.
Learn to let your unclean kitchen floor or every little dust slide – try to do something meaningful instead it. Hire a housekeeper if you can afford it financially. Spare some time only for your needs every day. Your leisure time should be committed for your own desires and not for appeasement of anybody’s needs.
Written byRugile Kiguolyte

Friday 5 October 2007

Nice Hair!


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SUMANDAK BILANG: It’s Friday! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!

Sunday 26 August 2007

A Morning Shut Down

Macam my scandalicious cuzzie cabreney bilang I’m using a jam London. Ya, if you’re sibuk mencari berus gigi… Sia pula sibuk mencari blanket. I’ve not gotten any sleep since 4pm yesterday… In other words, sia inda ada dapat tidur satu malam. I’ve tried to sleep tapi lepas tu ended with pigi ruang tamu and watch some boring movies yet couldn’t sleep. My blood pressure still under control… Normal… Tapi yang bikin takut ini mata inda pandai tutup… Urang tengah bangun pasang radio Kadazan or Dusun, sia pula sibuk mau cari tilam.

Maybe I should ask some of my friends yang pernah kena situasi begini… I know there are 2 of my friends yang mimang need medication untuk sleep. I hate staying up sampai pagi sebab tiada urang yang sia bulih chat kalau sudah limpas tengah malam… BORING! TV pun boring!

Saturday 25 August 2007

I'm an Insomniac

What is Insomnia?
Insomnia is a 2002 American remake of a 1997 Norwegian film about a police officer investigating a murder above the Arctic Circle and suffering insomnia due to the midnight sun and his guilt over past and present misdeeds. The film was directed by Christopher Nolan and starred Al Pacino, Robin Williams and Hilary Swank. 
-Source: Wikipedia 

Insomnia is a novel written by Stephen King and first published in 1994. Like It and Dreamcatcher, its setting is the fictional town of Derry, Maine. 
-Source: Wikipedia

Insomniac is the fourth studio album from the punk rock band Green Day. It was released in 1995 on the Reprise Records label. Though it reached #2 in the U.S. and went 2x Platinum, Insomniac did not have the sales endurance of its predecessor, Dookie, largely due to its slightly darker lyrical tone and more abrasive sound. Though many consider Insomniac to be more consistent than Dookie, it did not feature a well-known hit single akin to “Longview” or “Basket Case” from Dookie or “Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)” from Nimrod. Before the name ‘Insomniac’, the band considered the naming the album ‘Tight Wad Hill’ (after the thirteenth track of the album). After visiting collage artist Winston Smith for the album cover, Billie Joe Armstrong asked him how he managed to make such intricate pieces in such short times. Smith answered, “It’s easy for me. I am an insomniac.” Insomniac has sold 2 million units in the United States as of August 2006. It is Green Day’s third biggest selling album after Dookie and American Idiot. 
-Source: Wikipedia

Insomnia is a sleep disorder characterized by an inability to sleep and/or inability to remain asleep for a reasonable period. Insomniacs typically complain of being unable to close their eyes or “rest their mind” for more than a few minutes at a time. Both organic and nonorganic insomnia constitute a sleep disorder. It can be caused by fear, stress, anxiety, medications, herbs, caffeine, depression, bipolar disorder, emotional or mental tension, work problems, financial stress, unsatisfactory sex life and sometimes occurs for no apparent reason. An overactive mind or physical pain may also be causes. Finding the underlying cause of insomnia is usually necessary to cure it. Insomnia can be common after the loss of a loved one, even months or a year after the death, if they are not grieving correctly (pretending they are over it when they are not). It very often occurs when the person has a lack of food or not enough variety of foods (such as eating one food over and over again). It is common for insomniacs to sleep walk and/ or have very vivid & intense dreams. 
-Source: Wikipedia

Friday 24 August 2007

Kisah 2 Hantu

Tersebutlah kisah dua orang hantu. Mereka ni baru bertemu lalu mereka pun berborakla untuk mengisi masa lapang kehidupan mereka sebagai hantu. Sepanjang perbualan mereka, Hantu B ni tak habis-habis menggigil. 

Lalu, Hantu A yang kehairanan ni pun bertanya, “Apsal kau ni asyik menggigil je?”

“Oh..cara aku mati dulu teruk..aku mati dalam peti ais…sejuk!!” Jawab Hantu B sambil menggigil lagi.

Thursday 5 July 2007

What Your Underwear Tells About You

Polka-dotted lingerie near your cleavage or silky g-string lace on your waist may disclose you more than you might think. Underwear type, color and fabric can talk much about personality as different people choose different undergarment. Have you ever wondered what type of wearer you are? Or maybe you want to guess your date’s temper?
Although women seem to have been given preference to be mad about clothing, men can choose from pretty wide selection of underwear types as well. Those who can’t live without briefs are reliable, but slaves of their habits. Don’t ask them to quit smoking or throw away toy soldiers collection! They don’t like to change their wardrobe, their free time activities nor comfortable life with parents. However men of this type are very stable and faithful. While a woman in granny panties is too shy and conservative to let anyone see her lingerie. People wearing briefs only pay attention to comfort, but ignores any trends. They are usually predictable and skip innovations. Mind that granny panties cover up a lot of body from upper thighs to belly button; if a girl choose to wear those, she doesn’t feel comfortable with her body.
Boxer shorts are the most popular pants type among men and pretty widespread among women. Boxers wearers are relaxed and self-confident men. They like the comfort but they also like to look good. A man wearing boxers knows how to choose wine in a restaurant, but he won’t tire you with snobbish talks nor try to get you deadly drunk. This type of men is the golden mean.
Girlie boxer pants differ from boxers for guys as it shows a bit of upper thighs and backside. Girl in boxers enjoys challenges and winning new territories. But don’t hurry up to imagine a feminist warrior. She knows when to tease, but she’s very feminine. Boxers wearer usually lives active life.
If a woman wears matching pants and bra, she’s most likely to be a real fashion follower. She knows the title of that new song on the radio and the list of most popular cafeterias in the town. She’s welcome in parties for her communicative temper. But watch out: she would rather go shopping than dating. However you can take her interest with tickets to brand-new movie.
The most common pants among women are bikinis. Girl wearing this type of underwear pays most attention to comfort. She is practical, but she likes to wear nice things. However you won’t see this woman in stockings nor corset, it’s too daring for her.
A woman in thongs or G-strings and lacy lingerie definitely likes to feel sexy. She won’t blush from a compliment and won’t be shy to tell her opinion about anything. Also a woman of this type won’t wait for a guy to introduce himself; she dares to run about after the one she likes. Thongs wearers are usually in the center of attention for their flirty talks.
While women wear thongs to compliment their shapes and avoid panty-lines, this type of underwear is pretty rear among men. If you’ve met a guy in thongs, you can be 90% sure he’s a stripper. The other ten percent are possible narcissuses that like to expose their goodies and sacrifice comfort for that. Man in thongs is party animal and swaggers about his sexual achievements.
Fabric and color of underwear can tell a lot as well. Fluffy clothing refers to playful person, while leather lingerie signalize its wearer won’t be stable in relationships. Silky underwear tells that person cherish her body and has a turn to pleasures.
Girlie and romantic persons choose white, sweet pink or flowers patterned lingerie, but daring pink warns about seductive and sensual woman. Red underwear shouts about energetic girl that loves to demonstrate her sexuality. Lovers of purple and yellow colors are original and unique; they are imaginative and creative in every way of their life including bed. Blue underwear is preferred by sensitive people, while green underwear discloses stable person that loves to be in charge and give commands. People that choose black undergarment are self-confident and know what they want. Bright colored or speckled with funny pictures underwear means that its owner doesn’t care about anyone’s opinion. However if you see a guy in strange patterned pants, it’s possible that his mom still holds him under control.
Underwear is no longer thingies to hide; they help people to create their style. But don’t follow these tips blindly; a girl in leather and chains can be sensitive and romantic person too.
Source: Jurgita